"I couldn't do that" (response to being a SAHM)
"So you are with Emma all day long" (while they give me the look)
"You don't have a job...you can do this for me"
(Found out we are having Twins) "You will never go back to work"
"I would go crazy if I stayed in the house all day"
"Must be nice to stay at home all day and do nothing"
"Your parents are retired now...cant they take Emma everyday so you can work"
"Shouldn't your wife start looking for a job now...Emma is older"
"Why do you get up so early...you dont have a job"
"Carissa can do it...what does she do all day anyways"
"You said whats going on with your family...whats going on with YOU"
When I became a Stay at Home Mom (SAHM) I had read arguments from different bloggers on the debate of the "Working Mom" versus "The Stay At Home Mom"...honestly, I never wanted to get into either side because I understood both sides of the debate. When Emma was first born I was still working and I worked up until she was almost 1 years old. Then our circumstances changed and we knew the best option for our family was for me to stop working and take care of Emma full-time while Darrick worked.
However, even though I never wanted to get into the debate that doesn't mean I wasn't automatically placed in it. I am convinced Moms don't understand how offensive they can be when they say these things to other moms. In my opinion no one understand the "struggle" of a mom more than another mom! I actually empathize with moms when they are placed in tough situations because no matter what your circumstances are being a mom is not easy!
Above I added a few comments that have either been made to my husband or I about our decision to be a one income family. Now I cant speak for all moms but I do know a main reason we didn't put our daughter in daycare right away is because she has some special needs. As I have written about many times she was born with a Cleft Lip and Palate...Emma has had multiple surgeries and usually has daily/weekly appointments for one thing or another. However, many of the people that have made these comments are fully aware of our situation but that has not stopped the comments!
I try not to be that person that is offended every-time someone ask about "OUR SITUATION" but I think I am getting to the point where I am getting fed up...Please Keep Your Comments to Yourself!
Yes, I'm home with Emma daily but unless you are offering some type of support or helping hand then I don't need to hear about "why you couldn't stay at home with your child" (you would do it if you had to)...its a sacrifice and it basically came down to I have to do this for my child and thats it!
I don't go around giving my opinions on Moms with a job so I am confused on why people feel its okay to say these things to other moms! When these things have been said to me...if I said what was really on my mind I probably wouldn't have anyone talking to me. And that may not be a bad thing; but realistically what is that going to solve?
Actually I love hearing about the working world...and I hope one day to get back in it because I've always wanted a career outside of the home, but like I have always said this is my path God has me on right now...so unless you are on His level...Please Keep You Comments to Yourself! Its a blessing that I am able to stay at home with Emma and we can bond...and that I will be able to have that same experience with my boys on the way...so if I'm not commenting on your situation I would appreciate you don't comment on mine!
How do you deal with comments about being a SAHM?